Wardrobe Malfunction

This is not the first time this has happened. You may recall the incident of the ripped skirt; however I'm doubtful my blogs are that memorable. There are a few people who remember, people who took me to Target at lunch, gave me their jacket to tie around my waist, and watched as I clumsily tried covering my butt in the Target parking lot, but that's probably it.

Maybe it's my gravitation to a good deal that lands me in these situations. Maybe I love finding a cute plaid sundress dress on clearance for nine dollars at T.J. Maxx...a dress that everyone says "Oh I love it, where'd you get it?" and I just pretend like I forgot when really I'm reveling in the fact that those compliments only cost nine bucks. Maybe I like finding a cute polka-dot silk shirt that looks like it came from J. Crew when really it came from Forever 21. Maybe I'm just cheap!!! We have no way of knowing.

But I'll tell you what I do know. Today at approximately 11:07 a.m., the following Fashion Citation was given to me by one, Lindsey Usher:

Infractions:

• Indecent skin display: check
  
• Maximization of flaws: check
• Peakaboo underwear: if only I was so lucky

Reason for citation- shirt ripped so badly down the seam that although I was wearing a cardigan, indecency was displayed, undetected by me.

Further more, I went on a walk with two co-workers, one of which has seen me through my previous crisis, both of which noticed the rip and failed to say anything. After an emergency trip to Target, one said, "I noticed it and thought, 'Hey, is her shirt ripped?' and then thought 'Maybe it's supposed to be like that' and forgot about it." Thanks for nothin.

The other had no excuse. I didn't notice the rip until I walked all through the building to my cube and sat down at my desk. Again I say to you- thanks for nothin.

Moral of the story:

I need better clothes and maybe better friends.*




*Just kidding. I like my friends. And finding a good deal. Eight times out of ten things work out.